cultural conflict

Around five years ago, my junior A came to my room in boarding school for help. She just had a fight with her roommate B. They both came from China, though distant parts. As single child at the age of 15, it is their first time leaving home and stayed with strangers. A came from a major city in Southern China  and brought toiletries from home. The idea of sharing toiletries never appeared in her mind. On the other hand, B came from a smaller city in Northeastern China, used to share everything with her friends. B was upset that A put another soap in the bathroom after B put one. B thought A had a problem with B as A did not gladly share B’s soap. A thought it was odd for B to use others toiletries. Slowly the tension built up between them. And they started accusing each other behind the back.

I understood the situation perfectly for I myself went through the same confusion when I first arrived and shared a room with girls from distant parts and different culture. People from Northeastern China are famous for their generosity and warmth towards new acquaintance. However, not everyone share and enjoy their warm attitude. It can be strange and offending to other people who need a much longer time to be comfortable with their “invasion” of individual’s private space.

After all, I do not think this is a serious problem. Being confined within their city prevented my juniors from noticing the existence of different interpretation of the same behaviour. So I suggested them to explain to each other their thoughts of the issue and conflict became a laughing matter after all.